- sitting across the ditch in our hut, and watching Ray LeBaron pretend to smoke, using a green water reed. And him having to be secret about it, which I think just made me more interested in smoking.
- walking in the gully alone, and thinking I could out run a mountain lion if I had to. Also feeling braver holding a rock, because I could defend myself with it if someone tried to attack me. David and Goliath style.
- being in 2nd grade and thinking I had 4 years till I was in 6th grade, then 3 years of jr high, then 3 more years till I was done with high school. It was overwhelming.
- making the "perfect" toast with butter and honey. I was a toast expert.
- pulling grass away from the bricks in the yard to watch the potato bugs. Thinking they were all friends, cousins, aunts and uncles to each other.
- staring at the stars and knowing for sure that God was out there. And the feeling felt so intense it was tangible.
- walking on the weird sidewalk that cut through the block at grandma's house, and trying to catch a glimpse of the pretty yard on the other side of the fence. But instead, catching the eyes of the old woman working in the garden, and her yelling something at me.
- playing at the little recess park for preschoolers at edgemont elementary. And always feeling like the teachers thought I was going to "try" something the whole time we were out there, like run away, kick someone, or jump off the slide... I remember thinking that my fellow classmates couldn't be trusted, and would probably tattle tale on me.
- staring at the sun, closing my eyes, then opening them to see the world in a weird green haze.Thinking the world looked like a weird old photograph.
- being hidden in the weeds growing around our house, and on the gully hill. Sitting and not being able to be seen. I thought it was so cool and cozy, I couldn't get enough of it.
- trying to find a comfortable side of my head to sleep on when I had a head full of braids and sponge curlers. thinking I could tell the time by the shadows in my room.
- in the winter just freezing in my bed at night, and not realizing I could go find an extra blanket somewhere, or just tell my parents how cold my bed was. I would just tough it through the night.
- sometimes when I walk into the production room here at work the smell of the hot papers coming off the copiers, documents being shredded and glue makes my mind think of suzy zoo stickers. The smell throws me back in time to the days when I used to walk up to canyon copy as a little girl to buy a bunch of stickers. I was obsessed with their stickers. Their stickers, their paper, their pens, pencils and markers. I spent more time drooling over the stuff there than at any other toy store. I still have all the stickers I "collected" in a binder somewhere boxed up in the garage.
- sometimes my biggest fear is dropping my cell phone into my cup of soda... it's weird but true. That would be a costly accident. And fishing out my phone with my hand would ruin the soda, I'd have to get a refill.
- sometimes when i am flying down a flight of stairs I marvel that my legs work the way they do. That the knees bend rhythmically, the feet land perfectly, and that nothing goes wrong and sends me collapsing down the stairwell. I also marvel that my thoughts have no control over this, without thinking about it my legs just seem to know what to do. And then, as I am thinking about how I am not thinking, I get freaked out. What a rush.
- sometimes I can't get over how delicious a banana nut bread clif bar is along side a cold diet coke. It hits the spot right here (I'm pointing to my tummy), and here (I'm pointing to my heart now), every time.
- sometimes at night when I watch the The Colbert Report I can't imagine a more perfectly humorous and wonderful character other than Stephen Colbert. He hits the nail right on the head with political satire. God bless the colbert nation.
- sometimes I don't want to read long meaty paragraphs. can't everyone just bullet point their lives?
